The Fainting Chair and the Tablecloth

Finding a second hand is where the actual hunt begins.

Directions are seldom straightforward, even though straight is what they say…” Go straight,” says the man I have asked at the side of the road, his left hand flat, like a Queen Elizabeth wave. He directs me, “Straight- straight-straight” …continue straight through the first two round points, then at the third round point, take the nine o’clock (that doesn’t mean the time, but implies at the round point to go three forths around, imagine the round point as a clock) continue straight until you see an old well on the right side, then take a sharp right, and go up the dirt road pass the houses. You will think it is the wrong way, but you’ll see it after the houses.”

I smile. “Merci!”

There is a shortage of sign makers in every country.

Straight, straight, straight I went.

The woman in charge is sitting nonchalantly on the edge of a clawfoot bathtub, casually picking at her nails, which seems like a scene out of a movie.

Like a ghost, I drift along, absorbing the leftovers of other people’s lives. In a large, black plastic garbage bag, I see what appears to be a foot of a chair sticking out. It was painted greenish grey, and that color was popular back then. I bite my lip in doubt. Please, please, please let it be! An antique, painted piece is rarely stumbled upon, authentic, or disregarded.

The fragments of what seems to be a fainting chair are in the plastic bag. None of the elements were broken; they were disconnected and stuffed in the bag without care.

“Bonjour Madame, is this for sale?” I ask.

Later, Michel, “tapissier en meubles,” restores the fainting chair.

He does things the traditional way: wooden pegs, no glue, no staples, uses only feathers and crin, plus uses small, flat-headed nails that he stuffs in his mouth and upholsters all by hand. He wrinkles his nose at my choice of fabric and says on the side of his mouth, “A tablecloth should be kept on the table, along with the napkins.” He continues, “Core-AY, you have such harebrained ideas!” Raising his hands and rolling his eyes, he shakes his head and exclaims, “Mais alors, I probably will eat my words; you have such luck! Bien sur, it will look good!”

After he restored the fainting chair, he cut into the linen tablecloth to upholster the fainting chair that I found in pieces in a garbage bag. 

When it is completed, I look at my Humpy Dumpty rescuer and, without a moment of hesitation, give him a big hug of gratitude; he smiles.


Repost: One of my first posts. Before cell phones and when directions were verbal.



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